Wednesday, October 12, 2011

“Grow old with me … the best is yet to be"



Realization dawned upon me like ice cold water down my spine. I was 30. Nothing more, nothing less—30. I couldn’t wrap my head around it … Was I really THAT old? When did it chance upon me? I felt like a mere 20-something till a night ago. Today was my birthday and I was supposed to feel like Santa on prozac! But I don’t …. I feel weighed down; by my age.

The voices have been following me since I was 25. I could hear them say, "How old are you?” “You’re getting there faster than you think!” “Hahahhaaa, just two more years till you turn 30!” “You are aging, you know ... You must get that night repair cream and under eye gel.” “Seriously what color are you dying your hair?” “Wow! You're 30?” “What!!!! You don't have children yet? You know your biological clock is ticking right?” “Happy 30th!!”

Yes! I am 30 and you could add a month or two to it!

I took this long to write about my 30th because I wanted to see and comprehend how it felt to turn 30. I wanted to know, if overnight, I would get wrinkles, if my bones would get brittle, my teeth would fall out or if my hair would all turn white?! But ... NOTHING HAPPENED! I woke up as the same person I was a day ago ... when I was 29!

It's such a huge deal when you turn thirty or are about to... even if you want to forget about it, people will constantly remind you about your age and make you feel sorry that you're no longer going to be in your 20's. It almost feels like an age where people go to curl up and die. The polite masses will constantly ask you how you feel about turning thirty and I wonder if they expect you to get offended by it. “I feel like crap” is probably what they want to hear.

Friends will tease you, doctors will warn you, parents will remind you, ads will throw the words "anti" and "aging" at you and your body will show you that you are turning thirty for real. You've definitely been thinking about your big 3-0 ever since you turned 29.... it was way closer than you thought it was; it pretty much pounced upon you, you think and you're already looking for ways to avoid it. There's a cloud overhead making you blue and there's nothing you can do!! Oh the horror of it all!!

The day went by and finally the sun went down on my 30th birthday but still no sign of "age". I was still looking for it to chance up on me! Where was it? Was it hiding? Did I miss it? Did everyone see it but me?

I was never so nervous about turning 30 to begin with … perhaps a little but not paranoid for sure. I don’t feel it and I definitely don’t act it (most tell me that). People believe that once you have completed three decades of your life, you have exhausted yourself of all the fun and are now ready to grow old or live a “matured” individual’s life. Really? Old? Who put that benchmark there? Why 30? Why any age? If you feel it … you be it! How can anyone be the judge of how you feel at any age? Age is just a number and that’s completely true. If you let it take control over your life, it will destroy you. It will be a constant reminder of who you are not anymore and how there are certain things you can’t do. It will bog you down and you have already lost your battle.

It is the prospect of turning 30 that is far worse than actually being that age. Once you are 30, you realize that you’re there and that nothings changed. You go on with your life as usual. I think I’ve been through enough in my life to fear “30”. It’s a new age, with new possibilities and new treasures to look forward to. My post 25’s was the best thing that ever happened to me …. I’m sure my 30’s will ring in a lot more wonderful times that I can probably put down as stories to tell the future generations! Today at 30, I’ve never been surer of myself than I was a year ago and that is a comforting feeling. I know I may not have achieved all that I had planned to by this age and my train might have derailed a little while I was enjoying my 20’s but it’s not all that bad and nothing that duct tape can’t solve!

Growing up is all about living and gaining various experiences that defined moments in your life have to offer. It isn't about achieving all that you thought you should’ve by that time, but enjoying the journey and getting there! Make the next ten years count and be proud of who you are and where you are instead of recoiling into your shell. Don’t fight that 30 year old inside of you…embrace it!

It’s a new age …. Who says you can’t dance the tango; who says you can’t swing in the park; who says you can’t eat ice cream out of a box? Just celebrate this new life …. I am! Laugh, cry, embrace, be open to new ideas and insights, love, follow your passion, dream, get inspired, cherish, say what you mean and more importantly be yourself.

On my birthday, I happened to chance upon John Lennon’s song, “Grow old with me … the best is yet to be”. Truer words have not been spoken … I think I’ll do just that.

9 comments:

Kinjal Darukhanawala said...

Very well-written. I am closer to 30 than I am to 20, but if anyone would give me a million bucks to turn back time I wouldn't do it, not a chance. The age between 25 and 30 and from there on is magical. You finally look at life sans the rose-tinted glasses and the view is far prettier than you imagined! And yeah, I totally think that 30 is the new 20 and 40 is the new 30 is total BS! 30 is 30 and 40 will be 40, and you will be a more fabulous version of yourself with each passing year! Happy 30th Cookies!

Harish said...

O yeah!

when i touched 30. i thought that life on the other side of the fence was full of pain and traas....

i was single-to-mingle then, and thought no one would like me... i suddenly would go to the mirror and think that every line on my face is a wrinkle in the making..

how was the time then, and how cool is it now..

and finally when i stepped on the other side of 30, i knew that my life couldnt have been more beautiful. :) all my fears were indeed just a false alarm.

Gayu.. you are at your sexy best at 30.. and i know you would just be sexier with every passing year.

sexier in spirit, in mind, in body... and in soul. :)

loveliness.. and welcome aboard!

you know, you can never be "aunty".. and even if you become Aunty.. it will be BUNTY (BABE+AUNTY)

LOVE YOU
harish

Jason said...

Bhaat ij thish? After being friends with guy, who is two years older than you, who you, yourself call crazy and fun, you had doubts?

Fie! Fie!

Let your journey be your destination!

Nike said...

It all matters as much as you'd let it bother.. I wouldn't give away the last 5 years of my life - yeah, might wanna change a couple of things here n there but overall, 'Best Birthday' I've ever had !!!

If I'd get a chance to turn 30 all over again, I'd do it just to have such an awesome day.

Now I feel like a undergraduate who's laughing at a tensed high school student fretting over his term paper !

A very well written post - kudos...

Amit S. Joshi said...

Another lovely post! Keep up the good work. I remember reading something to the effect of, "age is nothing but mind over matter. If you do not mind, it doesn't matter" Similar sentiments resonating from your post. Keep them coming.

Madhhurima said...

Lovely and apt article. Others, especially men, seem to remind me more, rather than women who are completely bindaas about it. As you know, I reached there nearly half a year prior to you... and nothing changed. I still feel like the child I always have... and guess, would continue to feel this way, always... :-)

pronoy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
pronoy said...

cookiespaws!!!

Great post. loved the 'duct-tape'wala line..
One thing for sure.. Whether its before 30 or after.. a awesome-story in-the-making has got an awesome writer..
Enjoy..

Anonymous said...

Now when did I turn 30? Hmm, once upon a time....long, long ago.
Seriously it didn't even dent my halo. As long as the knees don't creak. alls well.